**I was sure by now
That You would have reached down
And wiped my tears away
Stepped in and saved the day,
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining
**I'll praise You in this storm
And I will life my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never leave my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
**As the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away
This concept, friend, is not an easy one!! Do you praise the Father in the storms of your life? I will have to admit, some days are easier than others for me in dealing with the day in and day out trials of infertility. Today, Father, I praise You in this storm!
Tomorrow, on the other hand, may be a different story.
My Father, please help me to praise You in the upcoming tomorrows.
**"Praise You in this Storm" song lyrics recorded by Casting Crowns 2005
Monday, March 2, 2009
Saturday, February 28, 2009
What? You Prayed for WHAT???
I have a confession to make before this blog continues, and I begin to sound like 'oh poor, pitiful me!' In 2000, shortly after recommitting and truely giving my life to Christ, I was so intrigued by my Father. I wanted to think His thoughts, love like He loved, be knowledgeable like He was, and have a complete inward and outward transformation. Boy, did that happen!
I was in constant prayer with Him and surrounded myself with His word and His people. I truly wanted to be what He wanted me to be, think what He wanted me to think, and live how He wanted me to live. I read the book of Proverbs, Ecclesiates, and Song of Solomon (Jon and I had just began courting). I would read them over and over and over again and was completely awestruck over the wisdom of King Solomon. I thought to myself, "this man knows things--he knows people on the inside. My Father has given him such an asset--to know people, to know things." Then, I thought to myself, "I want this. Since my Father is the all-knowing, all-loving, all-powerful God of the universe--and since He was so generous to pour this gift out to Solomon, surely He had some left to give me."
"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction." Proverbs 1:7
The more I read of King Solomon's life, the more I realized this type of gift was received over a period of time, and that the Father did not just hit him over the head with His staff and command wisdom to enter his brain.
Henceforth, my prayer began; not only for wisdom but..........(shrieks) PATIENCE!
I prayed for it constantly--ignorant of the fact that NOONE prays for this! I just wanted so badly to be what He wanted me to be--to live a life holy and acceptable to Him--to feel like He would one day say to me, "Well done thy good and faithful servant!" I mean, He had brought me from a dying pit--consumed with internal fire and self-destruction--to a life full of LIGHT and Hope and Love and AWESOMENESS! And, not only did He save me from a burning flame after death, He saved me from the wreck satan and I had made of what I then called, 'my life'.
I felt like He was prompting me to pray for this, and I wanted to live a life of obedience. So, for about 6 months, I prayed daily for the Father's wisdom and patience. It wasn't until I spoke with a very Christ-like mentor I had at the time, that I realized NOONE prays for patience. Being the blonde, and ignorant in thought, I asked her, "But, why?" "Oh Krystal," she responded, "when you ask the Father for patience, you should be ready to accept the consequences that comes along with this GIFT!" I had no idea what that meant. I was in my early 20s and new at Christianity. She tenderly patted my shoulder, tilted her head a little, and replied, "When you pray for patience, our Father often uses the teaching technique so that we learn by doing in order to acquire this gift."
It wasn't very long until I knew exactly what she was referring to:
"Hope deferred makes the heart sick." Proverbs 13:12a
My Father has taught me this concerning PATIENCE: To obtain the favor of this gift, you must earn it and the only way to earn it is to practice its best teacher--WAITING!
I am so grateful my Father does not leave it at that, that waiting is not the end product, but rather a process.
"But when the desire comes, it is a tree of life!" Proverbs 13:12b Hallelujah!!
"Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart!" Psalm 37:4
I bet I can't get any takers on praying for patience. I have found few people who are willing to offer the sacrifice. I believe sociologist call this deferred gratification. Therefore, I wait!
I was in constant prayer with Him and surrounded myself with His word and His people. I truly wanted to be what He wanted me to be, think what He wanted me to think, and live how He wanted me to live. I read the book of Proverbs, Ecclesiates, and Song of Solomon (Jon and I had just began courting). I would read them over and over and over again and was completely awestruck over the wisdom of King Solomon. I thought to myself, "this man knows things--he knows people on the inside. My Father has given him such an asset--to know people, to know things." Then, I thought to myself, "I want this. Since my Father is the all-knowing, all-loving, all-powerful God of the universe--and since He was so generous to pour this gift out to Solomon, surely He had some left to give me."
"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction." Proverbs 1:7
The more I read of King Solomon's life, the more I realized this type of gift was received over a period of time, and that the Father did not just hit him over the head with His staff and command wisdom to enter his brain.
Henceforth, my prayer began; not only for wisdom but..........(shrieks) PATIENCE!
I prayed for it constantly--ignorant of the fact that NOONE prays for this! I just wanted so badly to be what He wanted me to be--to live a life holy and acceptable to Him--to feel like He would one day say to me, "Well done thy good and faithful servant!" I mean, He had brought me from a dying pit--consumed with internal fire and self-destruction--to a life full of LIGHT and Hope and Love and AWESOMENESS! And, not only did He save me from a burning flame after death, He saved me from the wreck satan and I had made of what I then called, 'my life'.
I felt like He was prompting me to pray for this, and I wanted to live a life of obedience. So, for about 6 months, I prayed daily for the Father's wisdom and patience. It wasn't until I spoke with a very Christ-like mentor I had at the time, that I realized NOONE prays for patience. Being the blonde, and ignorant in thought, I asked her, "But, why?" "Oh Krystal," she responded, "when you ask the Father for patience, you should be ready to accept the consequences that comes along with this GIFT!" I had no idea what that meant. I was in my early 20s and new at Christianity. She tenderly patted my shoulder, tilted her head a little, and replied, "When you pray for patience, our Father often uses the teaching technique so that we learn by doing in order to acquire this gift."
It wasn't very long until I knew exactly what she was referring to:
"Hope deferred makes the heart sick." Proverbs 13:12a
My Father has taught me this concerning PATIENCE: To obtain the favor of this gift, you must earn it and the only way to earn it is to practice its best teacher--WAITING!
I am so grateful my Father does not leave it at that, that waiting is not the end product, but rather a process.
"But when the desire comes, it is a tree of life!" Proverbs 13:12b Hallelujah!!
"Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart!" Psalm 37:4
I bet I can't get any takers on praying for patience. I have found few people who are willing to offer the sacrifice. I believe sociologist call this deferred gratification. Therefore, I wait!
Friday, February 27, 2009
Experiencing Newness
I love "new" things. A new friend, a new haircut, a new pair of shoes....
What i really love is newness of time. The beginning of the new year, a new month, a new week, and for the especially talented--like myself--who seem to bodge things up daily, a new morning!
(even though technically, I don't "do" mornings)
My Father knew when He created me to allow me many opportunities to begin again, because of the mastered ability I have in turning the smallest task into the biggest ordeal. J uses this analogy in football where all you have to do is hike the ball, throw it to the open receiver, and score the TD. I often find myself catching the ball but forgetting to run, thereby getting tackled--by satan--of course.
Luckily for me, my Father's plans are so much bigger than mine and His orchestration of an event--by far--runs marathons around my minuscule comprehensions of an idea.
"Behold, I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth; shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert." Isaiah 43:18
How awesome is my Father, who resides in me daily, that He would continue to guide me.
I am so grateful to emerge from the Bread of Idleness and into a "new thing", one that will take me places I've never been, meet people I never knew, explore options I never thought possible, and create in me a heart for Him I never had.
'Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; Great is His faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion, "says my soul, "Therefore, I hope in Him!" The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks HIM!' Lamentations 3:22-25
READY--
DOWN
SET
HUT HUT!!!
What i really love is newness of time. The beginning of the new year, a new month, a new week, and for the especially talented--like myself--who seem to bodge things up daily, a new morning!
(even though technically, I don't "do" mornings)
My Father knew when He created me to allow me many opportunities to begin again, because of the mastered ability I have in turning the smallest task into the biggest ordeal. J uses this analogy in football where all you have to do is hike the ball, throw it to the open receiver, and score the TD. I often find myself catching the ball but forgetting to run, thereby getting tackled--by satan--of course.
Luckily for me, my Father's plans are so much bigger than mine and His orchestration of an event--by far--runs marathons around my minuscule comprehensions of an idea.
"Behold, I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth; shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert." Isaiah 43:18
How awesome is my Father, who resides in me daily, that He would continue to guide me.
I am so grateful to emerge from the Bread of Idleness and into a "new thing", one that will take me places I've never been, meet people I never knew, explore options I never thought possible, and create in me a heart for Him I never had.
'Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; Great is His faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion, "says my soul, "Therefore, I hope in Him!" The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks HIM!' Lamentations 3:22-25
READY--
DOWN
SET
HUT HUT!!!
Eating The Bread of Idleness
I realized this site had an enormous overgrowth of cobwebs and decided it was time to update it a bit!!
I would love to report after 9 months of silence, I had become a wise and humble woman of God, valiant and victorious over sin and the attitude I have with the present condition of my circumstance! However, many of the people who know me well would more than likely turn up their noses in utter disbelief and demand a response for my hypocrisy!
Often times, over the past 9 months, I have found myself eating of the Bread of Idleness. I realize this is not a pleasant place to be, nor one someone of my stature should dwell in for great lengths at a time. But I have remained here by choice, because of unclear direction by the Father. I am guilty of not rushing ahead, not making hasty decisions, and remaining in an area too long because of fear. Not so much as fear for what will happen, but fear of rushing ahead of my Father. I learned this valuable lesson in my early 20s and might I just say, it is not a course I want to repeat, since I aced it with flying colors the first time.
I would like to report that I had led by the example Paul pointed out in his letter to the Corinthians, stating, "that I am able to comfort those who are in a similar fashion, as I have been comforted by my Father." However, as stated above, hypocrisy is uncomplimentary.
The word "idle" means to "lean idle, having no value, use, or significance". The root of the word "idle" means "to burn or shine" either in the sense of "only apparent" or "burned out". "Bread" is "food, especially grain for making it". Another word for idleness is indolence. Indolence means "disliking or avoiding work".
I must admit I have found myself guilty in certain aspects of this partaking, none of which I am earnestly proud of! I have chosen to exclude myself from others, incorporate a feeling of dissatisfaction at work, and hoard myself to the confinement of my home like a hermit. I have chosen to stay on the path of least resistance and thereby, I have become desolate.
UNTIL NOW................
I would love to report after 9 months of silence, I had become a wise and humble woman of God, valiant and victorious over sin and the attitude I have with the present condition of my circumstance! However, many of the people who know me well would more than likely turn up their noses in utter disbelief and demand a response for my hypocrisy!
Often times, over the past 9 months, I have found myself eating of the Bread of Idleness. I realize this is not a pleasant place to be, nor one someone of my stature should dwell in for great lengths at a time. But I have remained here by choice, because of unclear direction by the Father. I am guilty of not rushing ahead, not making hasty decisions, and remaining in an area too long because of fear. Not so much as fear for what will happen, but fear of rushing ahead of my Father. I learned this valuable lesson in my early 20s and might I just say, it is not a course I want to repeat, since I aced it with flying colors the first time.
I would like to report that I had led by the example Paul pointed out in his letter to the Corinthians, stating, "that I am able to comfort those who are in a similar fashion, as I have been comforted by my Father." However, as stated above, hypocrisy is uncomplimentary.
The word "idle" means to "lean idle, having no value, use, or significance". The root of the word "idle" means "to burn or shine" either in the sense of "only apparent" or "burned out". "Bread" is "food, especially grain for making it". Another word for idleness is indolence. Indolence means "disliking or avoiding work".
I must admit I have found myself guilty in certain aspects of this partaking, none of which I am earnestly proud of! I have chosen to exclude myself from others, incorporate a feeling of dissatisfaction at work, and hoard myself to the confinement of my home like a hermit. I have chosen to stay on the path of least resistance and thereby, I have become desolate.
UNTIL NOW................
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